What I’ve Learned From Being Single For A Week

After being in a relationship with the absolute, 100% love of my life for almost 5 years, and then losing him in a matter of 40 minutes, I expected myself to be a puddle on the floor. A shattered glass case of emotion. Broken, bewildered, and unsure. 

But I’m not. Why? Because I needed this. The man I “needed” for 5 years didn’t feel appreciated or liked, and more importantly, he knew I didn’t even like myself. I come off as someone who seems self-confident and sure of herself, but I’m not. I’m just not. And he knew that. He knew that whatever he did to try and make me happy wouldn’t work, because I couldn’t be happy with myself. Us not being together has been an eye-opener. It’s been more than a rude awakening. It’s been an enlightening. 

It’s been one week. To most people, a week isn’t a very long time. To someone who has consistently had the same person in their life for five years, it’s an eternity. No, no, this is not me complaining. Every day, more and more, I am seeing in myself what he saw in me, and that for whatever reason I couldn’t project into our relationship. Now, I bet you’re thinking, “he broke up with you. Why aren’t you hating on him so hard?” Because I am still in love with this man. I care about him. I have no reason to hate him. He did nothing to me but strive to make me happy and I didn’t recognize that. I didn’t give him enough attention or make him feel like a man whose girl needed him, which is the ultimate thing men want—to feel like a man. 

He challenged me to use our time apart to figure out what I want from life, our relationship, how to better myself, and why we fell apart. At first, I was skeptical. Now, I’m not. Sure, I get frustrated with why we aren’t having a real conversation. But actions are better than words in this case. Of course, I have my moments of “psycho” where I text him a few times in a row telling him things I should have told him when we were together. Key word: should have. But didn’t. 

So, after that long winded introduction, here’s what I’ve learned from being single for one week.

  1. Running is therapeutic. 
  2. Talking to a professional about your personal problems is NEVER a bad idea. Never be afraid to seek help.
  3. Remembering the good times shouldn’t make you cry. It should make you smile.
  4. Being bitter toward happy, loving couples will just make you unhappy. Look at them and see what they’re doing that you couldn’t manage to do. It’s not their fault that you’re single.
  5. Go to work. Be happy at work. Be happy all the time.
  6. Writing down a positive thing that happened in your day can make a world of difference.
  7. I personally regret not making my compassion and appreciation toward him vocal enough. You can never be too appreciative. Try thanking your mom for that five dollars she gave you the other day.
  8. If you don’t understand your breakup, give it time. Talk it through with CLOSE friends. If you’re close with his family, and they’re willing to talk to you, do that. 
  9. Be vulnerable. You probably weren’t doing enough of that.
  10. I learned, first and foremost, that I caused an amazing thing to be torn apart, completely unknowingly. I was blind to every sign that he was unhappy. Opening my eyes to his emotions has made me understand why he did what he did. 

I know that a lot of people will not agree with this post. I don’t care. 

Remember that you are never alone. And the best medicine is happiness, and the best “revenge” is happiness. Nobody wants to be with someone who is miserable all the time.

I think it’s time for an update.

I have to confess: I don’t use Tumblr anymore. And if I do, it’s rare, and short lived. Why? Unfortunately, I think that the Tumblr community has become WAY too judgmental towards others, especially new people to the site. I’ve been on Tumblr since early 2009, so for me, it’s hard to watch how new people get treated. It’s unfair, unkind, and anyway, without those new people, how would Tumblr grow? It wouldn’t. 

TL;DR: Stop being jerks to each other.

Anyway. In the past two months I have managed to travel the globe. Two months ago today I left for Melbourne, Florida to head to Port Canaveral to go on my first cruise with Royal Caribbean. It was 8 days, and we went to Mexico, Haiti, Grand Cayman, and Jamaica. It was incredible! I went with my boyfriend Alex and his family, and I just had the absolute time of my life. I cannot WAIT to go on another cruise (which might be for New Year’s this year…yes that soon!). 

About a month later, I left for Florida again, but this time to Orlando because Alex and I were leaving for Hawaii out of Orlando Airport. We spent 3 days in Orlando before leaving for Hawaii. We were in Waikiki Beach the whole time and spent about 4 full days there. Short trip, but a beautiful trip! I’d love to go back, but I think I need to save up thousands before I can go back. Everything was so expensive!

What’s next? Possibly Chicago! I’m itching to go back to New Hampshire, so I might go there for a bit at some point. 

Where are you dying to go?

Currently Reading: “The Here and Now” by Ann Brashares

The latest release from Ann Brashares, author of the Traveling Pants series, is a lot different from the Traveling Pants books, but I’m really pleased and happy that it’s different! This book, at 288 pages, is a quick read, but an enjoyable science fiction-y thrilling ride. It’s a story of Prenna, a 17-year-old who is from a different time—the future, more specifically, the year 2098. 

She falls for Ethan, and their romance becomes an impossible one. Overall, I thought that this book was well written and I liked the main characters. Some of the events are unbelievable, but isn’t that the point of a science fiction novel? Yes. Ethan is basically a perfect character, so he’s easy to like. Prenna questions authority, and it’s refreshing to see more “girl power” characters. I enjoyed this book! It wasn’t slow, and it was easy to read in about two days. I recommend it!

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Rent the Runway Capstone Weekend 2014!

Last weekend, I had the opportunity to attend Capstone Weekend in New York City hosted by Rent the Runway. I was able to see CEO and Co-Founder of RTR, Jennifer Hyman, speak so passionately about the company, and I found her talk to be most inspiring. 

That’s her! She was speaking about the company, how it started, who’s investing, and where RTR will be in about a year. It was seriously girl-power inspiring, and I felt really lucky to be sitting that close to such an empowered woman.

I also saw Lisa Salzer of Lulu Frost speak, as well as VP of Marketing for L’Oreal Paris, Kristen Comings. 

Lastly, I was able to hear from Ann Shoket, Editor-in-Chief of Seventeen Magazine. Unfortunately, I found her talk a little disheartening. Her biggest point was to “intern at big-name places,” even if you’re not doing anything meaningful. The name is more important than the work you’re doing, is basically what she said. I found myself extremely discouraged, since it seemed like she was advocating that the only meaningful internship is at Seventeen or Vogue, or other “big” magazines like that. It kind of made me rethink what employers think of interns in the first place. She’s still an incredible woman who has really taken the helm of Seventeen and made it a great magazine. 

Here’s me (in the black jacket) and my friend Meredith, who is another Runway Rep, in front of the Rent the Runway offices!

This is the entrance to the beautiful Rent the Runway showroom in Henri Bendel on Fifth Avenue in NYC. It’s incredible; I tried on a $4000 dress by Matthew Williamson! Although really, the only thing that felt expensive was the fact that the price tag said $4k. Otherwise, I would not have known, to be honest. Although the dress was incredibly stunning!

I really had an incredible time last weekend, listening to such inspiring women and interviewing for an internship position with RTR for this summer! I definitely recommend applying to become a Runway Rep for this fall!

Anonymous asked: About the inversion hair method, would my Hair get used to the blood flow if I do it a week for like 3 or 4 months?

Nope! As long as you do it one week a month, your hair will be fine. Just space out the weeks evenly. That’s what I’ve been doing, and my hair has grown 3 1/2 inches in three months!

finewithwine asked: PENN STATE <3

Yes girl!! Penn State forever :) 

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(Source: acompletelife)